I made you to protect myself…
The way you move in my mind shapes me. I was crouched down, my head tucked safely in my knees to hide from my suffering, my arms holding on tightly. You pulled me up and made me look into your eyes and then you looked away.
You have a smile that is scorched into me, that gave me life again. Feelings I thought were buried deep down came back to the surface, but they can’t fight the fear that already survives there.
My body is weak, bruised, pain runs through me in places that will never heal.
I don’t know you, you don’t know me, but I’ve made a life for us. It’s a beautiful place where no one ever gets hurt, where you hold me tight and keep me safe. It’s where the stories I’ve heard about you don’t exist, where you will fight for me, protect me against any, and all the liars that live there, and where you are not one.
I wish you weren’t just a face in a crowd, I ache for you to be as real as I imagine you are.
Sometimes I want to live in my dreams. Every so often I beg the universe and the Angels that watch over me, to prove to me that you belong to me, that soulmates really do exist. Occasionally I believe that you will come to me, that you think of me too, that you watch me as much as I watch you. Nonetheless I’ve seen you looking for others.
You laugh louder with everyone else, you’ve told them your story but shy away from me, looking only at them, those who say you are no good for me, those who know you better than me.
I’ve seen the ones before me, they walk in your world, they look how you want them too and I’m just unnoticed.
You are the oil that sets fire to this lie…
I’m just an unwelcome face in a crowd…